4.16.2007

Just have to say it...

Lying next to my husband, being face to face with his handsome, intoxicating features, that is my favorite thing. Watching his eyes slowly close shut and his full lips separate as he quietly inhales through his mouth in a drifting, peaceful sleep. I am blessed to be at his side, clothed only by his lingering affections and prayer. I am in love, deeply, completely. I want to talk and laugh just a little longer under the glow of land stars sneaking through our window. I want to caress his chest and feel his beating heart as it keeps time with my own. But I do not want to wake my lover, so I silently speak blessings over him and turn to my side, knowing his frame will instinctively turn into mine, covering my unveiled figure with his own, submerging me in his arms of strength and tenderness. I want to breathe-in his fragrant being and saturate my soul with his. But to do so would be like pricking my own two fingers, rubbing them together and making a blood covenant with myself, as we are already one. Our chests rising and falling together, our bodies meshed in God’s gift of forever. I whisper into the harmony of night, “I love you,” for my darling is asleep and cannot hear my confession. I cry out to the angels, to God, to my past, to the future. I make my declaration to the whole earth, to the universe, that they may simply hear and know. I just had to say it. I love this man.

4.12.2007

Welcome Me

The earth’s breath galloped into my living room beneath the metal front door and cantered its way down the chimney, swirling around the room like a horse beckoning me to take it for a ride. The breeze rushed across my toes and nudged me toward the window where a hawk harnessed the wind and soared upon it’s back. Leaves corralled together on the limbs of the grand tree that stood below my balcony, summoning me with their restless sway to join in their motion.

As I pulled on the chilled door handle a cool gust pushed it’s way in, zigzagging in figure eights around my cheeks and neck. I wished I’d grabbed a jacket, but somehow, the stir of the air caressing my skin and playfully trotting along every hair on my arms was exhilarating- as if my soul had been awakened for the first time in weeks.

I saw the hawk again. His feathers racing the very current on which they took flight. He steered downward to the waving leaves and reined a branch with his talons seeking rest. As he basked briefly, a gentle flurry dashed across his beak and he turned in my direction, as if he too, had been renewed by this moment.

The hairs on my head hurdled the sweet breath as it wrapped me in a ribbon of refreshment and whispered, “Welcome to spring. May you feel my tender tug on your heart, pushing you onward through another season.” So welcome spring. Welcome change. Welcome me.

2.19.2007

Politically Incorrect

A fog of stupidity has smothered the part of our brain that holds common sense. A steamy mist of delusion has covered all reason. We've let a cloud of misguided beliefs settle over our society, yet no ones willing to blow enough of their own smoke to push the looming blob of ignorance away. Well, my lungs are full of fresh carbon dioxide just waiting to be exhaled, to create a whirlwind that removes any residue of hatred, racism, or our fear of offending everyone and anyone if we have an opinion contrary to theirs. So I'll start by blowing out this simple question: Since when has being honest become something we must apologize for? Since when has standing up for ourselves become something we can only do as long as we don't go against someone else’s stand. We can't reject a specific group of people yet they can reject us. We allow our own opinions and beliefs to be scrutinized, but we are afraid to scrutinize the beliefs and opinions of others. We have to watch our mouths, bite our tongues, coddle the sensitivities of every minority group regardless of their race, age, sexual orientation, religious beliefs or unbelief’s, but we aren't allowed to be sensitive about our own issues, beliefs or social stands.

How is this possible? This is America. This is the year 2007. How have we allowed ourselves to be so infected with fear? The fear that we’re going to hurt someone’s feelings. The fear that we no longer have the right to free speech. The fear that we won’t be liked. What do we care? We’re American. No one likes us anyway. So why are we so afraid of words. Beautiful, powerful words. Obviously we care about words or they wouldn't make or break so many careers today. But in the end, they are still just words. They are still just someone’s opinion. Someone’s belief. Someone’s take on life. So why do we treat them like they must be ours too? Can't we stand on our own truths, building a solid foundation for ourselves and leave everyone else’s shaky platform alone? If we focus our energies and passions on others, we too will be left standing on a weak foundation. And if we're all firmly believing from a delicate stance, then whose standing on a firm belief?